Catch 23 Banking

Many people were suggesting that I fight the bank, and the situation was annoying me enough. Here's a copy of the first email I sent. Let's see how it goes:

To whom it may concern,

I was recently notified that my savings account with [bankname] would be changed from a fee-free account to a fee-paying account. I am now living in Canada, and so tried to close this account yesterday by calling [bankname]. However, I was advised that it is impossible to close the account without being physically present at a branch. It is clearly not possible for me to get to any [bankname] branch any time soon, but I would still like to have the account closed as soon as possible so as to avoid additional fees.

Please be aware that, within that one phone call, I was able to authenticate my identity, have my phone banking password reset, have my internet banking re-enabled, and have my account changed to a different "product". [bankname] seems perfectly happy to grant access to my money over the phone after passing simple challenge-response security questions. However, [bankname] claims to be unable to stop charging me fees for an account that I do not want, unless I make myself physically present. This seems an inappropriate way to treat a customer and certainly doesn't improve my view of [bankname]'s operations.

So, with all due respect, I insist that my account be closed and my money transferred to a different institution. I can provide the account details when requested.

Sincerely,
Peter Harvey.